I can't remember exactly when we decided to sell everything, leave my job, and move to Europe for a year. It's strange that the exact moment doesn't stand out. Instead, a series of decisions positioned us to take the leap.
Every family's journey is different. Some of the decisions we made would likely benefit most families, and some would be lunacy. I share them in case someone finds them useful and because Henri and I made them together. We knew changing our frantic lives was a necessity and I am proud of our bravery and cohesiveness.
Many people think we are crazy and reckless; more people are supportive and envious. I understand both perspectives and sometimes have my own doubts about our decisions. We are not afraid of failure; we are afraid of not trying and of a boring life. Thomas Watson, Jr. said, “If you want to increase your success rate, double your failures.” We believe this whole-heartedly and have approached our adventure with preparation and thought. If we fail, we will come home and try something else to make our family life what we want it to be.
We started making changes that pushed us towards a year abroad about 18 months before our departure. The real estate market was out of control at that point. Houses were selling for well-above asking price and “as is.” Our family home was a beautiful three-story 100+ year old home in the heart of an urban neighborhood called Brookside. We bought the home just before we married and had renovated it extensively. We brought our twins home there and watched them meet every major milestone in the many rooms.
Our neighbors were our dear friends. However, the house required major upkeep because of its age and size. Utility bills reflected money blowing out with the freezing drafts under doors and cracks during the winter. We ran the air conditioning constantly in the summer and the third floor was never comfortably cool. Henri and I agreed that this was not our forever-home; we decided to sell in favor of renting and the freedom it provided. We reasoned that we might sell the house at a market high and without need for any repairs and then buy in the future when the market was better. This was by far the most difficult decision we have made in our journey.
We contacted our realtor and readied the house for listing, which required very little effort given the real estate market. In the first 48 hours, 40 people scheduled showings and three made offers. A wonderful family purchased the house, and we were delighted that they would now enjoy it with their young kids.
The next step was to find a rental property. The criteria for our rental included:
· Smaller (a lot smaller really) to prepare us for the Airbnbs and Vrbos in which we would stay while in Europe
· Unique living situation for the kids (think downtown!)
· A view- I think having beautiful views change everything.
· Amenities- most importantly and indoor and outdoor pool. If we were giving up a backyard, we wanted something novel for the kids to enjoy after school.
· New! We wanted to leave behind our creaky and unlevel floors for something sleek and modern.
· Safe parking and an easy commute
Kansas City is a large city, but these criteria narrowed us to just a few buildings. We toured them and put our name on the waitlist for the one that would become our next home. We ended up sacrificing space for amenities and looked forward to living in the heart of downtown.
We underestimated how much “stuff” we had accumulated and how long it would take us to prepare for the move. Our apartment is 1200 sf and 2 bedrooms, approximately ¼ to 1/3 of our family home. Henri and I absolutely love getting rid of things- even finishing an entire food container in the pantry or fridge is satisfying. This downsize pushed even our limits on minimizing.
I believe that everyone can benefit from getting rid of unnecessary material things. See my next blog post about decluttering.
We mostly love 15th floor apartment living but it also has its downsides. In addition to the lack of space, it has taken awhile for us to get used to the noise. We miss our backyard and front porch and the neighborly interactions that happened spontaneously. Our view is spectacular but includes flashing lights best seen from the kids’ bedroom window for the local strip club (ugh). Thankfully they haven’t asked any questions!
We choose to focus on the positive. Living downtown is lively and unique. Activities at Union Station, the library, and the theaters are right at our fingertips. The views of the buildings, city lights, construction projects, and planes landing at the downtown airport, never get old. Time spent with neighbors and friends is less spontaneous but now more personal and high quality. The kids have friends in the building and playdates have never been easier. Swimming is an almost daily activity and social events planned by the building include fun and unique activities.
We are very grateful for the opportunity to live here, but also acknowledge what we gave up and the sadness that we still feel when in our old neighborhood. Whenever I am missing our old house, I picture the four of us walking through Florence together and I remember why we did it and that it will be worth it in the end.
