When they learn our plans for a gap year, most people are enthusiastically supportive. They say things like: "I'm so jealous" and "you're doing something everyone says they want to but never actually do." The most frequent comment is, "what a great experience for your kids." The life-lessons we hope to learn as a family are driving us to continue on this unusual path. I have had many doubts about our decision to take a gap year, but I always come back to the benefits we hope for as a family.
The 5 Goals of our Family Funishment Year Abroad
1. Spend more quality time together
Henri and I both have extremely busy jobs. When you add in the kids' activities and the fact that we don't have any family in town to help, our schedules often feel unbearable. When we were recently watching the Winter Olympics, Ollie asked me a question. "Why can't you just watch the Olympics. Why do you always have to be on your computer or phone or folding laundry too." I obviously felt awful. Multitasking is a skill I am proud of, but I realized that it made my kids feel like they didn't have all of me.
During our year abroad, I look forward to less multitasking and more enjoying the moment- whether it's fun or feels like punishment. I'll be taking it all in!
2. Grow in Grit
Grit is defined as: courage or resolve, strength of character. We are finding this a difficult characteristic to teach our children. Our lives are blessed and we have everything that we need. The daily routine of school, work, and home-although busy-is unencumbered by hardship. We have God to thank for it all.
I believe strength often comes from struggle and courage comes from being uncomfortable. All four of us could benefit from being more uncomfortable and staying in that space. Traveling has always pushed me outside my comfort zone and I look forward to watching my kids grow in grit.
3. Minimizing stuff
I've already written about the greatest benefit of our decisions so far.... GETTING RID OF STUFF! Minimizing has been liberating for us. We are about to take it even further when we start our trip.
Four backpacks and one duffel bag will hold all our belongings for 1 year!! Some serious shopping (and a lot of returning) have lead us to the best gear and clothes we can find for frequent washing, hiking, and sight-seeing. We are about to find out how little we really need; I think that realization will serve us very well over the next year and beyond.
4. Experience other Cultures
While we hope to travel to even further parts of the globe in the future, we are looking forward to introducing Elsie and Ollie to different cultures in Europe. The twins are accustomed to everyone speaking English, every restaurant serving their favorite food, and every city feeling mostly like Kansas City. There is so much more for them to see, taste, and experience. We are thrilled about giving them to opportunity to start that journey in Europe.
5. Identify What We Really Miss
I already know the answer to this one: OUR FRIENDS AND FAMILY! It's hard to imagine life without our inner circle; that has been the only major downside to our family gap year. We will continue to guilt everyone into coming to visit us, and will use the stillness of the upcoming year to identify what else we can't live without. Do we prefer the quiet of the Swiss Alps or is the buzz of the city that we need? Do we miss our careers or are there other opportunities we want to experience?
Dreams and reality are often discordant and we are here for it! We want to EXPERIENCE life (the good and the bad) and develop the personal strength to be flexible and comfortably uncomfortable.
Theodore Roosevelt once said that people should "keep your feet on the ground and your eyes on the stars." I love this quote because it reminds me that I can be practical and a dreamer at the same time. I look forward to fostering dreaming within my family.